And the Hits Just Keep On Coming

Shortly after I posted my last entry, I got a call from Meredith about a proofreading job scheduled for today. Seems they wanted me to come in an hour earlier, that is, in an hour. I said sure, I could do that (I want them to keep calling me for jobs, so I try to be as accommodating as possible) but, crap--no shower yet. Or breakfast. Double crap. No time for both cleanliness and a full stomach: what to do about breakfast?

"Junk is always good ," I told myself, reaching for a Reese's Peanut Butter Egg. Then whapped myself upside the head with a metaphorical 2x4. Junk food? Junk food?! Seems that's all I eat, lately. How does that serve my goals of eating healthy and achieving a healthy weight (not to mention the one about eating breakfast every day)? Bad Hannah. Bad, bad, bad Hannah.

And that's when something else hit me. (Yeah, I know, my poor head. Don't you feel sorry for me?) Aha! I'm procrastinating about my grad school application and I feel guilty about that.

• Procrastination + guilt = I'm a bad person.
• Bad person + punishment = self-defeating eating behaviors (kinda catchy, no?)
• Poor choices + guilt = I'm a bad person.

Which leads to more procrastination, and the whole damn cycle repeats. Endlessly. Or not. I just need to break the cycle. Must. Break. Cycle.

In case you're wondering, as I type this I'm eating lunch, a real one: a Subway roast beef sandwich with red wine vinaigrette rather than mayonnaise (6 grams of fat or less, according to Jared), baby carrots instead of chips, all accompanied by a lovely bottle of 2005 Dasani. See, I can do it.